Term
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Definition
We want to form relationships with others (does not need to be romantic)
-we want them to be frequent and consistent over time
-it is a basic need. |
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Definition
| anything that draws two people together making them want to be together and possibly form a lasting relationship (does not need to be romantic) |
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| This can contribute to relationship formation... |
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Definition
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Term
| West gate floor plan experiment |
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Definition
| this study was done in an apt. complex to find out who would have a relationship with whom. |
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Term
| Who will you like more? people who live on same floor or above/below you (west gate results) |
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Definition
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Term
| Who are you more likely to like? person next to you or across from you? (west gate) |
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Definition
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Term
| What location is most likely to have more friends? |
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Definition
| by the stairs (everyone must pass your door to get to theirs) |
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Definition
The more often you encounter something, the more you will like it.
used in advertising
MUST be neutral feeling when you are first meeting/coming in contact with the object |
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Term
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Definition
| if you didn't like it the 1st time, then exposure to it over and over again makes it worse |
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Term
| physical attractiveness influence our view of others |
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Definition
| appearance DOES matter to humans (Welcome Week study) |
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Definition
| questionnaire showed physical attractiveness was the reason why people chose their favorite dates even though they had the same IQ, hobbies, etc. |
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Definition
| states that we tend to choose partners who are matching in attractiveness and other traits to our own. |
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Term
| When is matching hypothesis violated? |
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Definition
| Women tend to put priority on wealth, security, and safety more than attractiveness (Donald Trump & wife) |
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Term
| Physical attractiveness stereotype |
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Definition
| "What is beautiful is good" |
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Term
Good looking people have...
but do not differ on... |
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Definition
more friends, better social skills, and more active sex life;
do not differ on objective measures of intelligence, personality, or self-esteem |
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Term
| Standards of beauty vary across culture but some are valued in all cultures.. |
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Definition
waist to hip ratio
youthful features
suggestions of health |
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Term
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Definition
| More symmetrical the face, the more average it is (we are attracted to average looking faces) |
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Term
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Definition
-movies and magazines have an effect
-see someone hot of the same sex: feel bad b/c we are not up to those standards
-see someone of opposite sex--higher positive mood |
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Term
Attractiveness may..
people who are ___ & who we ____ are seen as more attractive |
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Definition
change with age;
good;
love |
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Term
"Birds of a feather flock together"?
Similarity vs. complementarily idea |
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Definition
we like those similar to us
research does not support that opposites attract, may evolve as relationship progresses. |
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Term
| How does liking others increase the extent to which they like us? |
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Definition
| If you like someone and demonstrate it, then they tend to like you more back. |
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Term
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Definition
| being excluded, rejected, and ignored by others; powerful social force. |
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Term
| Ways rejection is used as a social punishment: |
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Definition
The "cold shoulder"
Shunning
Banishment
Solitary confinement (horrible consequences to the mind) |
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Term
| Laboratory manipulations of rejection: |
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Definition
| Cyber ball, personality test |
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Term
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Definition
| tendency to expect rejection from others and to become hypersensitive to possible rejection |
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Term
| Link b/n rejection and physical pain: |
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Definition
| first thought distress felt after rejection but people actually feel numbness |
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Term
| After we have been physically hurt.. |
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Definition
| our body goes into shock, to stop the feeling of pain. |
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Term
| Researchers concluded that we feel numb/shock after rejection... |
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Definition
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Term
| After being rejected people have... |
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Definition
| a higher pain tolerance (suggestion that these two systems are connected b/n emotional and physical pain) |
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Term
| People who take Tylenol every day feel... |
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Definition
| less rejected b/c their nerves are shut off from pain |
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Term
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Definition
Painful feeling of wanting more human contact or connection than you have;
not fulfilling your need to belong
-long term |
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Term
| Lonely people are not worse off in terms of... |
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Definition
| social skills but tend to use social skills less |
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Term
| Lonely people are worse at figuring out... |
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Definition
| the emotional state of others (may be cause, effect, or both) |
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Term
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Definition
-cannot be induced in the lab
-not limited to people who are literally "alone"
-is different for everyone (quality not quantity of relationships) |
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Term
| Ways that loneliness can be staved off: |
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Definition
-group relationships (clubs, orgs, teams) fulfill men more than women
-imaginary friends (celebrity gossip, characters of video game or book)
-pets |
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Term
| Children are rejected for three main reasons: |
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Definition
Aggression
Shyness
Deviance from the norm |
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Term
| Biggest contributor for loneliness among adults: |
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Definition
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Term
| Most commonly cited reason for ostracizing someone: |
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Definition
| They deviated from expected norms |
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Term
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Definition
| situation in which one person loves another but the other does not return that love |
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Term
| Mismatch in reasons for romantic rejection: |
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Definition
| felt reasons & expressed reasons |
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Term
| Felt reasons for romantic rejection: |
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Definition
global, internal, stable
You are a bald slob who will always be a bald slob. |
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Term
| Expressed reasons for romantic rejection: |
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Definition
Specific, external, unstable
"it's not you, it's me"
"I can't go out with you b/c i have work" |
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Term
| Behavioral consequences of rejection: |
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Definition
| depends on how much fear you have of negative evaluation |
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Term
| If you have a low fear of negative evaluation... |
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Definition
| you don't care what people think, you are comfortable being who you are |
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Term
| If you have a high fear of negative evaluation... |
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Definition
decreased empathy
decreased self control
decreased pro-social behavior
increased anti social behavior
(Columbine shooters) |
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Term
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Definition
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Term
| High levels of this are in people that are "in love" (passionate love) |
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Definition
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Term
| PEA & passionate love make you feel: |
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Definition
| tingling, excitement, high intensity and frequency of sexual desire |
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Term
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Definition
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Term
| Newlyweds have sex ________ during their first year together and ________ during their 2nd year together |
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Definition
18 times a month;
9 times a month |
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Term
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Definition
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Term
| What % of couples have sex more than 3 times a week? |
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Definition
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Term
| Who has highest frequency of sex? |
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Definition
| Unmarried cohabiting people |
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Term
These couples have physical/emotional satisfaction...
These couples have more effort... |
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Definition
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Term
| Strong feelings of longing, desire and excitement towards a person (this starts a relationship) |
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Definition
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Term
| high level of mutual understanding and caring -less emotional, maintains the relationship |
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Definition
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Term
| Sternberg triangle of 3 characteristics of love: |
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Definition
Passion
Intimacy
Commitment |
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Term
| begins the relationship, romantic attraction, physical attraction, and sexual interest (Sternberg triangle) |
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Definition
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Term
| fosters the relationship, feeling close, understanding and mutual concern (Sternberg triangle) |
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Definition
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Term
| conscious decision even if feelings and emotions come and go (Sternberg triangle) |
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Definition
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Term
| kinds of relationships: (2) |
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Definition
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Term
keep score- I cooked so you do the dishes;
reciprocity and fairness |
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Definition
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Term
no score;
love and concern |
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Definition
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Term
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Definition
Anxious/ambivalent
Secure attachment
Avoidant |
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Term
| want to be close as possible, complete merger w/ other people (red head in Wedding Crashers) |
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Definition
| Anxious/ambivalent attachment |
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Term
| comfortable balance, don't need complete merger, comfortable with who you are |
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Definition
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Term
| uncomfortable getting close, maintains a distance (these adults result from parents who don't respond to crying child) |
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Definition
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Term
Relationships start off good and..
Bad relationships..
(Maintenance) |
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Definition
then they continue to be good;
get worse |
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Term
| Gottman's 5:1 Positive vs. negative effects: |
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Definition
| for every bad/negative instance, there must be 5 good instances for the relationship to work |
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Term
| Gottman's Relationship killers: |
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Definition
"Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse"
Contempt (treating other wrong for character while you think you are perfect)
Defensiveness
Criticism
Stonewalling (ignoring them) |
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Term
| Responding to something bad w/ something else bad; matching criticism w/ criticism |
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Definition
| Reciprocity of negative behavior |
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Term
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Definition
| the argument, the relationship won't last |
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Term
| Investment model (Rusbult) |
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Definition
Satisfaction
Investment
Quality of alternatives |
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Term
| Relationship- enhancing attribution: |
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Definition
happy couples-
Internal factors for good behavior
External factors for bad behavior |
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Term
| Distress-enhancing attribution |
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Definition
unhappy couples' tendency
external factors for good behavior
internal factors for bad behavior |
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Term
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Definition
| attractive vs. unattractive others |
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Term
| Girl watching, boy watching |
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Definition
when partner looks at opposite sex & stares
longer you look, more likely to break-up,
generally, ppl in successful relationships devalue potential alternative mates. |
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Term
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Definition
| is overrated; people look & act better on dates, people fall in love with the person they see on dates |
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Term
| Who do you fall in love with? |
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Definition
| The person you see on dates, don't need false personality but don't need to show all your cards |
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Term
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Definition
| better to be viewed more positive than you actually are. |
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Term
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Definition
| what people actively do to try to make someone like them |
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Term
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Definition
| the ability to change one's behavior for different situations |
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Term
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Definition
| the proposition that people and animals will perform behaviors that have been rewarded more than they will perform other behaviors |
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Term
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Definition
| being near someone on a regular basis |
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Term
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Definition
| the idea that a partner's annoying habits become more annoying over time |
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Term
| What is beautiful is good effect |
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Definition
| the assumption that physically attractive people will be superior to others on many other traits |
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Term
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Definition
| the idea that one person who breaks the rules can inspire other people to break the rules also |
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Term
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Definition
| persisting in romantic, courtship, or other behaviors that frighten and harass the rejecter in a relationship |
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Term
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Definition
| regarding yourself as being a reasonably good person as you are |
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Term
| Social constructionist theories |
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Definition
| theories asserting that attitudes and behaviors, including sexual desire and sexual behavior, are strongly shaped by culture and socialization |
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Term
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Definition
| theory of sexuality asserting that sex drive has been shaped by natural selection and that its forms thus tend to be innate |
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Term
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Definition
| theory that seeks to understand social behavior by analyzing the costs and benefits of interacting with each other; it assumes that sex is a resource that women have and men want. |
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Term
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Definition
| the sexually arousing power of a new partner (greater than the appeal of a familiar partner) |
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Term
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Definition
| the degree to which the sex drive can be shaped and altered by social, cultural, and situational forces |
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Term
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Definition
| having sex with someone other than one's relationship partner, such as a spouse of boy/girlfriend |
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Term
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Definition
| beliefs held in common by several or many people; public awareness |
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Term
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Definition
| the fact that a man cannot be sure that the children born to his female partner are his. |
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Term
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Definition
| condemning women more than men for the same sexual behavior (premarital sex) |
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Term
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Definition
| condemning men more than women for the same sexual behavior |
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