Term
| It’s important to build a rapport with the client, build rapport, maintain rapport, not judge him, but try to get as much information as you can about any violent behaviours that are occurring (exploration of violent behaviour), noting he may be minimising, and denying his behaviour, |
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Definition
Importance of DV counselling.
1. build a rapport
2. try to get as much information as you can about any violent behaviours
3. change the understanding of the behaviours |
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Term
2. Does alcohol and drugs cause domestic violence?
a. No it doesn’t cause it. As there is always likely times that they were violent without drugs and alcohol.
b. drugs may take away the guilt of perpetrating domestic violence |
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Definition
| 2. Does alcohol and drugs cause domestic violence? |
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Term
| Its fine to have conflict in relation (it allows to grow), but the difference between conflict and domestic violence is the presence of fear. |
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Definition
| Is conflict in a relationship ok? |
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Term
Why do people stay in abusive relationships?
a. Violence happens in a cycle. Some times things are good and this gives the victims hope
b. Risk of leaving vs risk of staying. Hard to know.
c. Violence is not always peoples priortites. i.e. losing the kids, not having financial security
d. Fear of leaving, resulting from physical and emotional abuse (see the Duluth Wheels) |
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Definition
| Why do people stay in abusive relationships? |
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Term
Violence: Aims to supress conflict and her ability, to fight back, to subjugate her:
a. Strangulation, assault, criminal damage, abuse during pregnancy, threats of suicide (saying their blood will be on their hands), Use of whips, belts, guns, knives, etc |
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Definition
| Violence: Aims to supress conflict and her ability, to fight back, to subjugate her: |
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Term
Isolation: Aims to remove who contradicts his statements of control
a. Sepertation from family, kept from medical care, stalking or the perception of eliminating the possibility of reaching out for help, moved across town/state, forced withdrawl from clubs or social activities, minimal weekly allowance so financially leaving is not an option. |
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Definition
| Isolation: Aims to remove who contradicts his statements of control: |
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Term
Initimidation: Aim is to make her feel scared, dependent and helpless:
a. Mere height and weight difference, threats of violence, use of legal system for deportation (or taking the kids away), threats of repeated physically or sexual violent incidences, exposure of questionable desions from the past, surveillance or appearing to do so. |
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Definition
| Initimidation: Aim is to make her feel scared, dependent and helpless: |
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Term
Control: Aim is to take control over basic necessities in life:
a. Controls the money, controls when to eat, bathe, sleep,etc, controls where and when she can work, controls access to children, controls vehicle use, time away from home is monitored and subjected to interrogation upon return, controls her ability to breather and/or live by repeated strangulation |
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Definition
| Control: Aim is to take control over basic necessities in life: |
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Term
Sexual cohersion: Aim is degradation:
a. Forced and coherced relations, forced anal sex, rape, secual inspection, threats to tell friends and family about their relationships, threats to share videos or photos about sexual encounters (this is a crime) |
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Definition
| Sexual cohersion: Aim is degradation: |
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Term
Identifying people using Domestic Violence via family indicators: ...
a. If there was violence in his family, if he was abused, or witnessed abused in the home
b. If he was physical punished in his family
c. If his father wasn’t present, and the mother was very moody and demanding. And he didn’t feel emotionally safe with his mum |
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Definition
| Identifying people using Domestic Violence via family indicators: ... |
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Term
Identifying people using Domestic Violence via community indicators:
a. Did he grow up in an agreesivve community where it was seen as normal
b. If there were gangs and violience to be normal
c. If there were no community resourse or people to stop or say no to violence. |
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Definition
| Identifying people using Domestic Violence via community indicators: |
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Term
What to do different instead of domestic violence:
1. Communicate,
2. Recognise anger patterns and stop them from occurring,
3. rewire how their scripts about they handle conflicts |
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Definition
| What to do different instead of domestic violence: |
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Term
P of DV may move between 3 stages, PERSECUTOR (its your fault), RESCUER (you need me take care of you), VICTIM (you hurt me). Each stage is unhealthy
a. Persecutor: Bullshit!, You’re just like your mother
b. Rescuer: I can protect you from your bad friends.
c. Victim: Give me a break, I’m not blood superman, |
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Definition
| P of DV may move between 3 stages, PERSECUTOR (its your fault), RESCUER (you need me take care of you), VICTIM (you hurt me). Each stage is unhealthy |
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Term
You need to debunk the myths about how DV affects the kids. May believe:
a. It doesn’t affect them, they’re too young
b. They can’t hear us they’re asleep
c. It was good enough for me, it’s good enough for them. I’m ok aren’t I |
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Definition
| You need to debunk the myths about how DV affects the kids. May believe: |
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Term
Why children need support:
a. So they don’t grow up think the DV is ok
b. So they feel loved and worthy.
c. So they know it’s not their fault |
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Definition
| Why children need support: |
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Term
Why are kids important to the P of DV:
a. Kids can be an important reflection of their actions, what they dealt with when they were kids and how that affected them. How the abusive effect ripples out to everyone they’re connected to, if they’re changing that also ripples out to everyone |
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Definition
| Why are kids important to the P of DV: |
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Term
How do people cope with life inside a violent home?
1. Women may not leave because they feel embarrassed, that they deserved it,
2. The most vulnerable stage for a women who is in a violent relationship is when they’re planning or tyring to leave that relationship. That’s where there is the highest potential for lethal violence. |
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Definition
| How do people cope with life inside a violent home? |
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Term
Cycle of Domestic Violence:
Relations go through the following phases:
1. Honeymoon Phase
2. Tension Phase
3. Explosive Phase |
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Definition
Cycle of Domestic Violence:
Relations go through the following 3 phases: |
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Term
Cycle of Domestic Violence:
Relations go through the following phases:
a. Honeymoon phase
i. the couple becomes very close emotionally the effect of the generosity helpfulness and genuine interest from the partner in this phase your partner makes you feel important cared for listen to and valued then it fades and moves into the tension building phase |
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Definition
Cycle of Domestic Violence:
Relations go through the following phases:
a. Honeymoon phase |
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Term
Cycle of Domestic Violence:
b. Tension building phase
i. A period of increasing pressure mood swings irritability demands and emotional withdrawal this phase may feel like you're walking on eggshells you can tell something is about to happen once the tension reaches an unbearable level it ends with the explosive episode |
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Definition
Cycle of Domestic Violence:
b. Tension building phase |
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Term
Cycle of Domestic Violence:
c. Explosive episode (then back to Honeymoon phase).
i. This is when the abusive outbursts happen this can be a push or shove a threat being made or carried out or more high-risk behaviors like choking or strangulation however this doesn't last forever the cycle comes full circle and we're back in the honeymoon phase gifts reconciliation physical affection attention promises or apologies during this phase it feels like things are finally back to normal you are reminded of the reasons why you fell in love with this person you're beginning again over time the honeymoon phase will become shorter and sometimes will fade completely |
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Definition
Cycle of Domestic Violence:
c. Explosive episode (then back to Honeymoon phase). |
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Term
3. Over time the honeymoon phase shortens or disappears all together.
4. However people stay in the relationships because, love, hope that things will change back, fear of leaving, denial something bad is happening) |
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Definition
| Problem with Cycles of Domestic Violence and how they continue: |
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Term
THE CHILD WHO HAS WITNESSED THE ABUSE,
WHETHER IT BE SEXUAL OR PHYSICAL, WILL END UP WITH MORE TRAUMA THAN THE CHILD
WHOSE ACTUALLY BEEN ABUSED.
YOU ADD ALL OF WHAT THE VICTIM FELT AND THEN YOU ADD THE IMPOTENCE THAT THE CHILD FOR THE OTHER PERSON FELT BECAUSE THEY COULDNT FIX IT.
This can lead to the children committing DV in the future. |
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Definition
| Effects of Domestic Violence on children: |
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Term
FAMILY VIOLENCE COURT AND DOMESTIC VIOLENCE PREVENTION PROGRAMS
An “intervention order” is issued under the Intervention Orders (Prevention of Abuse) Act 2009 to protect a person from abuse, which is broadly defined to include physical, sexual, emotional, psychological or economic abuse. |
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Definition
| FAMILY VIOLENCE COURT AND DOMESTIC VIOLENCE PREVENTION PROGRAMS |
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Term
The terms of an intervention order can prohibit communication and contact of any kind by the defendant including texting and Facebook contact, being in proximity to the protected person, property damage and taking possession of property needed by the protected person.
The terms of an intervention order can also include the requirement for the defendant to undertake an assessment for an intervention program and if found suitable, to participate in a recommended program |
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Definition
| What can an Intervention Order do? |
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Term
Domestic Violence,
is "the willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior as part of a systematic pattern of power and control perpetrated by one intimate partner against another.
The frequency and severity of domestic violence can vary dramatically; however, the one constant component of domestic violence is one partner's consistent efforts to maintain power and control over the other." |
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Definition
| What is Domestic Violence? |
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Term
Abusive behaviors vary in nature, and typically escalate from bad to worse.
Generally, abuse starts out with verbal abuse.
After verbal abuse typically comes the emotional abuse.
Physical abuse, generally, comes next on the continuum |
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Definition
| Abusive behaviors vary in nature, and typically escalate from bad to worse. |
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Term
Why people may not report domestic violence:
However, instead of limiting abuse, what happened was women stopped reporting it and began to withdraw from legal protection. Abused women feared that: Police would take their children away from them because there was violence coming from the husband or significant other. That their husbands or significant others would seek revenge on them after being released from jail. They even fear that they would be unable to support their children without their husband's or significant other's income. |
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Definition
| Why people may not report domestic violence: |
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Term
1. Seeing their mothers stay in a physically abusive relationship.
2. A social responsibility to keep up the facade of a happy home
3. Early learned insecurity that they are inferior and deserve abuse. |
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Definition
| Women tend to stay in physically abusive relationships for many reasons, including: |
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Term
The children in violent homes are often neglected or abused. Victims of childhood abuse often become the perpetrators of violence in later life.
Physical and mental issues often develop in a child from an abusive home that follows him or her into adulthood. |
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Definition
| Whats happens to children in Domestic Violence? |
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Term
| Male abusers were usually abused as children, or watched their mothers being abused, or saw abuse perpetrated by male friends (e.g., gang rapes as initiation rites for girls at skip parties). |
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Definition
| Whats happens to children in Domestic Violence? Part 2 |
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Term
| The male's veneer of icy indifference conceals a strong emotional dependency on the significant other or wife. |
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Definition
| Are men emotionally dependent on their spouses in domestic violence? |
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Term
| Anger management involves discussions of dominant and controlling behaviors, and the development of personal responsibility. The abuser needs to control his own or her own behavior. |
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Definition
| Anger management strategies for domestic violence |
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Term
23. Each individual in the group should examine his or her emotional responses that are reflected in angry behaviors.
24. The emotions behind the anger are usually sadness, pain, rejection, humiliation, and at the core of all of it. pride.
25. Help them to identify the underlying feelings or mindset that the anger is stemming from, and allow them to talk about what is going on beneath the surface.
26. Discuss families and relationships.
27. Relate childhood experiences to present attitudes and behaviors. |
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Definition
| Anger management strategies for domestic violence Part 2 |
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Term
Effects of Domestic Violence on Children:
1. moving in and out of home
2. fear of violence or abuse
3. inability to talk about what has happened
4. loss of concentration and declining performance at school
5. bedwetting in younger children
6. depression and suicidal thoughts in older children
7. alcohol and drug use
8. aggressive learnt behaviours
9. becoming mistrustful towards all adults |
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Definition
Effects of Domestic Violence on Children:
1. mo____ in and out of h____
2. f____ of vio____e or ab____
3. in____ty to t____ about what has happened
4. l____ of co____ation and d____ing performance at school
5. be____ng in younger children
6. d____sion and s____al thoughts in older children
7. a____ol and drug use
8. a____sive learnt behaviours
9. becoming m____stful towards all a____s |
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Term
Types of Abuse: Physical Abuse (Violence, or threats of violence.)
• Hitting, punching, kicking, hair-pulling, or other physical harm
• Using objects or weapons to cause harm
• Physical restraint
• Preventing partner from eating or sleeping
• Threatening to repeat physical harm |
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Definition
Types of Abuse: Ph_____l Abuse (Vi_____e, or th_____s of violence.)
• H_____g, p_____ng, kicking, hair-pulling, or other physical harm
• Using o_____s or w_____s to cause harm
• Ph_____l restraint
• P_____ing partner from e_____g or s_____ng
• Thr_____g to r_____t physical harm |
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Term
Types of Abuse: Emotional / Psychological Abuse (Insults, threats, isolation, extreme jealousy, and controlling behaviors.)
• Name-calling, belittling, humiliation
• Yelling and screaming
• Controlling what partner does, what they wear, and where they go
• Isolation from friends and family
• Threatening to commit suicide if partner leaves |
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Definition
Types of Abuse: E_____al / Psychological Abuse (I_____, th_____, is_____n, extreme j_____y, and co_____ng behaviors.)
• Name-ca_____g, b_____ing, hu_____on
• Y_____g and screaming
• Co_____ng what partner does, what they w___, and where they go
• Is_____ from fr_____ and family
• Threatening to c_____ su_____ if partner leaves |
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Term
Types of Abuse: Emotional / Psychological Abuse (Insults, threats, isolation, extreme jealousy, and controlling behaviors.)
• Threatening to kill partner, their loved ones, or pets
• Destroying something important to partner
• Gaslighting: manipulating partner into questioning their own sanity
• Blaming partner for abusive behavior |
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Definition
Types of Abuse: Emo_____l / Psychological Abuse (I_____, th_____, is_____n, extreme j_____y, and co_____ng behaviors.)
• Th_____ing to k___ partner, their loved ones, or pets
• D_____ing something im_____t to partner
• Gaslighting: man_____ng partner into qu_____ng their own s_____
• B_____g partner for ab_____ behavior |
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Term
Types of Abuse: Sexual Abuse (Unwanted sexual contact, forcing pregnancy, or forcing partner to terminate pregnancy.)
• Persistent unwanted comments about partner’s body or sexuality
• Unwanted kissing or touching
• Threatening or coercing partner into unwanted sexual activity
• Rape or attempted rape |
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Definition
Types of Abuse: S_____l Abuse (Un_____d s_____l contact, fo_____ pr_____cy, or fo_____g partner to t_____te pr_____y.)
• Pe_____nt unwanted co_____ts about partner’s b____ or se_____ty
• U_______d k_____g or touching
• Threatening or coercing partner into un_____d s_____l activity
• Ra___ or attempted rape |
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Term
Types of Abuse: Sexual Abuse (Unwanted sexual contact, forcing pregnancy, or forcing partner to terminate pregnancy.)
• Preventing access to contraception, refusing to use it, or purposefully damaging it
• Harming partner in order to force miscarriage
• Purposefully infecting someone with a sexually-transmitted infection |
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Definition
Types of Abuse: Sexual Abuse (Un_____d s_____l contact, fo_____ pr_____cy, or fo_____g partner to t_____te pr_____y.)
• Pr_____ing access to co_____tion, r_____ng to use it, or pu_____lly damaging it
• Ha_____g partner in order to force mi_____age
• Purposefully in_____g someone with a sexually-t_____ted infection |
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Term
Other Types of Abuse:
Digital Abuse:
- Constantly demanding to look through partner’s phone,
- monitoring their emails and texts,
- posting hurtful information or pictures on social media, or
- sending threatening texts or emails. |
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Definition
Other Types of Abuse:
D_____ Abuse:
- Constantly de_____g to look through partner’s phone,
- m_______ng their e_____ and texts,
- p_____g hurtful information or pictures on s_____ m_____, or
- s_____g threatening t_____ or emails. |
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Term
Other Types of Abuse:
Financial Abuse:
- Using money to manipulate and control partner,
- not allowing them to work or go to school,
- not giving them money for necessities, or
- stealing their money or possessions.
Stalking:
- A pattern of following,
- monitoring, or harassing someone,
- causing them to fear for their safety. |
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Definition
Other Types of Abuse:
F_____al Abuse:
- Using m_____to ma_____te and control partner,
- not allowing them to w_____ or go to s_____,
- not giving them m_____ for ne_____es, or
- s_____g their money or possessions.
S_____ng:
- A pattern of following,
- mo_____ng, or harassing someone,
- causing them to f___ for their s_____. |
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Term
Common Reactions to Abuse
1. depression, including suicidal thoughts
2. resentment, anger, and aggression
3. fear of the abusive partner
4. uncertainty about how to escape abuse
5. denial that abuse is occurring
6. substance use
7. anxiety, shame, and self-blame
8. social withdrawal |
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Definition
Common Reactions to Abuse
1. de______ion, including su______ thoughts
2. r______nt, anger, and ag______on
3. f____ of the abusive partner
4. u________ty about how to e______ abuse
5. d_____ that abuse is oc_____ng
6. s_______ce use
7. a_____ty, s_____, and self-blame
8. s_____ wi_____al |
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Term
Why People Stay in Abusive Relationships:
A. Fear
1. The abuser may threaten suicide, to harm children, pets, or property, if the victim leaves.
2. The victim may fear more severe abuse if they are caught trying to leave.
B. Rationalization
3. The victim may believe they deserve the abuse, tell themselves it’s “not so bad”,
4. feel the relationship is otherwise good, or
5. believe the abuser will someday stop their abusive behavior. |
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Definition
Why People Stay in Abusive Relationships:
A. F_____
1. The abuser may threaten suicide, to harm children, pets, or property, if the victim leaves.
2. The victim may fear more severe abuse if they are caught trying to leave.
B. Ra________tion
3. The victim may believe they d_____ve the abuse, tell t________es it’s “not so bad”,
4. feel the relationship is otherwise g_____, or
5. believe the abuser will someday s_____ their a_____e behavior. |
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Term
Why People Stay in Abusive Relationships:
C. Financial Limitations
1. Abusers may prevent the victim from working, control their money, or threaten to steal their possessions.
2. Many victims face homelessness, or may struggle to support children, if they leave.
D. Cultural Stigma
3. The victim may be part of a culture in which abuse is accepted or divorce is strongly discouraged.
4. They may risk losing friends and family if they attempt to leave an abusive relationship. |
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Definition
Why People Stay in Abusive Relationships:
C. F_____al Limitations
1. Abusers may prevent the victim from w_____g, co_____ their money, or th_____n to steal their possessions.
2. Many victims face ho_____ess, or may struggle to support children, if they leave.
D. C_______l Stigma
3. The victim may be part of a culture in which a_____ is a_______d or d_____e is strongly discouraged.
4. They may risk l_____g friends and family if they attempt to leave an abusive relationship. |
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Term
Abuse Facts:
1. Abuse is widespread, and both men and women may be victims. About 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men report experiencing severe physical violence from an intimate partner in their lifetime.
2. Abuse is never the victim’s fault. Though the abuser may try to blame the victim, the abuser is responsible for their actions. Anger issues or a desire for power and control may lead to abuse. |
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Definition
Abuse Facts:
1. Abuse is w_____ead, and both men and women may be victims. About 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men report experiencing severe physical violence from an i_____e partner in their lifetime.
2. Abuse is n_____ the v_____’s fault. Though the abuser may try to b_____ the victim, the abuser is re_____ble for their actions. Anger issues or a desire for p_____ and c_____l may lead to abuse. |
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Term
Abuse Facts:
3. Domestic abuse doesn’t require marriage or cohabitation. It can also happen among those who are dating, divorced, have a child together, or live separately.
4. Abuse doesn’t discriminate. People of any race, gender, or economic status can commit or experience abuse. |
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Definition
Abuse Facts:
3. Domestic abuse doesn’t require m_____e or coh_____ion. It can also happen among those who are da_____, di_____d, have a c_____ together, or live se_____ly.
4. Abuse doesn’t di_____ate. People of any race, g_____, or ec_____ status can commit or experience abuse. |
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Term
Say what you mean,
Mean what you say,
but don't say it mean. |
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Definition
| Assertive Communication Style |
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